Introducing Franny

Anonymous.  I want this blog to be anonymous for many different reasons.  The first being that I am totally and utterly embarressed by the state of my frumpiness.  I got here the way most women do.  Being a stay-at-home-mother.  I can remember wanting to be a fabulous SAHM when I was a little girl, but when it happened to me, there was NOTHING FABULOUS about it.  You see, unlike most SAHM's, I didn't choose this path.  I was forced into it by the downturn in the economy and budget cuts that put over 6000 teachers in my state out of work.  After coming off of maternity leave, there were no jobs in my county and neighboring school districts were just too far away for me to even try.  So I went on unemployment and slipped down into the spiral of depression, eating, and just overall not caring for myself. 

Now I have to be totally honest with myself and you (the 1 or 2 people who may eventually read this blog) and say that I have been in a cycle of self-destruction pretty much all of my life.  But there have been moments of happiness and little moments of fabulousness so I know I'm capable of making this monumental change.  The thing is, I'm tired of being frumpy.  I'm tired of looking in the mirror and seeing that I am REALLY beginning to look my age.  I am 38 right now.  In less than 2 years, I will be turning 40.  I want my 40's to be the most fabulous decade of my life yet.  My 20's were all about college and beginning my career as a teacher.  Then there was the little stint where I tried to find myself and instead found a husband, LOL.  My 30's have been all about the kids.  Getting pregnant, losing babies, birthing babies and finding out those babies had a rare disease and would be "special needs" kids.  There's a whole other public blog I write about that. 

But now that I come to the end of my 30's, I have decided it's time for a change.  I want to chronicle my journey from being "Absolutely Frumpy" to "Absolutely Fabulous" by the time I turn 40.  While this is an anonymous blog for now, I may use pictures with my face because that is part of my change too.  Don't worry, I'm not planning on getting cosmetic surgery or anything.  I just need to start wearing makeup and taking care of my skin.  This journey is about changing the parts of myself that don't make me happy.  Parts of myself that have tortured me for my entire life (or at least since the age of 9 or 10???).  In essence, I am tired of hearing my own complaining.  I am calling myself Franny because that is the little part of me that is constantly complaining.  I am going to try to tame my Franny inside.  Make her stop complaining and start doing something about it.

What I Wore Today

My Inevitable Pony Tail

My side profile

This is Franny.  Notice the unmade bed in the background.  The unkempt appearance of the horrible pony tail.  Pants that are really too big.  I've lost 18 pounds since last year, but don't have much in my closet that really fits me well.  The shoes are over a year old and really need to be replaced.  No makeup on my face.  This is how I look about 95% of the time on any given day.  And now, I want to change.  Welcome to my blog.  Follow me on my journey.  Is anybody else on a journey of change?  Join me in the comments section.

Franny